Most Americans love the fiction that they are the captain of their personal ship of destiny. There's a romantic imagery that comes with that. You against the world. You, creating your own path. Well, here's the problem: the more you believe that you have to be in control, the less in control you become.

Because let's face it, the world is a chaotic place. You can create, write down, or formulate the very best laid plans, and they will not pan out exactly as you planned them. That's just the way things work. As the old saying goes, life is what happens when you're making other plans. And to believe that you always have to be in control, that everything has to take place based on how you planned it is the worst form of self sabotage. Because life doesn't work that way. Often times, when we plan 100, we should be happy if we get 50. 50 is definitely quite an improvement from the 20 that you're usually getting. Do you see where I'm coming from? And the problem is, this sense of control leads you to an impossible attachment to perfection. You feel that you're not really in control if things do not pan out exactly how you imagined them to be. Instead, accept the world for what it is instead of insisting on how it should be.